Braindead Shithead

I realize, this is going to come as a shock to some of you, but please, try and take in what I'm about to tell you.
Sit down, hold a loved ones hand, and be prepared for the most shocking revelation since "The DaVinci Code" proved to be fiction.



ADAM ANT IS TAKING OVER THE WORLD.


Have you got that? Taken it in?
Okay.

I'm sure you're wondering what the fuck I'm talking about. But, if you'll just bear with me for a moment, take a look at the evidence for yourself, you too will realize that a good 30 years after his initial successes, Mr. Ant's horrible, evil plot to take over the world is finally coming to fruition.

First up? Here's Mr. Ant's video for "Goody Two Shoes". While those of you with more memories of the '80s than me (okay, for some reason I have like no memory of the '80s. All my friends my own age do. Just not me. I'm smelling conspiracy here...) will no doubt recall some of his other successful songs, this one has always been the essence of Adam Ant to me.



Several points to note here...

* Pirate dress. And, a tied midriff shirt. Which to me clearly says GAY pirate dress.

* The make-up. Sweet baby Jebus, the make-up.

* Do I detect a wee bit o' skunk hair at the end?

First up.
Gay Pirate Dress.
Um, I don't think I need to say any more than that for you to immediately think of Captain Jack Sparrow from "Pirates of the Caribbean". While Mr. Depp has wisely chosen to tone down the extreme make-up look of Mr. Ant, going instead with a more sublter black liner, he has clearly spent time studying Mr. Ant's bold fashion choices.



According to Wikipedia, Mr. Depp has claimed his influences for the character to be Keith Richards and Pepe LePeu. While he certainly has a right to claim whatever he wants, I think the evidence shows who he's really under the influence of.
P.S.-I'm not the only one to make this connection.


Second
The make-up.
No one has managed to make that rectangular look work since then.
Until now.
Enter the new video, made by Ms. Janet Jackson, as her re-entrance to the world of popular music.
(trust me folks, unless you want your brain to melt and run out your ears, for the love of god mute the damn thing)
She makes many...um...DARING fashion choices, but what caught my eye most was the large block of red she decided to put around her eyes.
Coincidence? I think no.




Third
The reappearance of the skunk hair.
Now, I was all for blaming this on Blondie. True, we haven't seen her in awhile, but dear god, the incidents of seeing adult women with the black/blonde two tone has gone up dramatically in the past few months.
I was all set to blame it on this band, Shiny Toy Guns...
(I liked the song, which led me to this abomination. I was going to make a post just to ridicule it, but no, more pressing truths have been revealed)



This video has a subtler version of the black/blonde than I typically see, or that Deborah Harry had. I can see its roots clearly now.

Bonus evidence?
Here's a pic of Mr. Ant in concert...



And here is a pic of the lead singer of one of my favorite bands, The Bravery...




Clearly, the evidence points to only one conclusion.
Any day now, Mr. Ant will re-emerge into the public eye to proudly show how well his finely honed, devious plot has worked.
Taken individually, a few comparisons might have been made, but put together like this?

I'm scared.