Braindead Shithead

Though I don't watch much television, I realize most Humanoids enjoy hours of mind-numbing entertainment on the boob tube. One of the top shows is Lost. I know nothing of this show except a bunch of people (most of whom seem to be young, thin and pretty) have survived some plane crash and are now stranded on some deserted island that may or may not have some monsters on it. Is that about right?

Anyway, I stumbled across this item over at e-Junkie and decided to pass it along. It's a detailed geographical analysis of Lost, including the island, the tribes, and tons of other stuff. The picture is huge (7200 X 7200), so I shrunk it down. You can download the complete picture in an .rar file here.

And remember...

This is just hilarious, in a Monty-Python-esque-animated-violence kinda way.

In continuing with the meat theme, here is everything you've ever wanted to know about pork but were afraid to ask (for fear someone might actually tell you!). In addition to the usual propaganda items, like how pork will make you big and strong, there is plenty of stuff for the kids!

For instance, you can play the fun 'Pork Jumble' game. The object of the game is simple: "Unscramble the mixed up letters to create a "porkriffic" word!" Could there be any word better than "porkriffic"? I really don't think so.

There are also neat tips on how to "show" your pig at the county fair. Remember, the key to having a successful showing is proper training. "Start working with your pig far enough in advance so that you and your pig can get to know each other and so that the pig will respond to you." Sound advice, indeed.

Lastly, we have fun stories and videos! Tell me you aren't riveted by the story of pork chops Bombay (shouldn't it be called 'pork chops Mumbai'?). Posted below are the two videos, "Destiny on the High Sea" and "Forbidden Love".

Mmmm...meat!


Sweet Meat at Bolt.


You Won't Get A Bum Steer at Bolt.

Continuing our special series for vegetarians, or those who will become vegetarians after watching these videos, we have over a half hour of USDA inspired meaty goodness. These videos were produced circa 1970. Sadly, unlike J.R.'s "How To Buy Meat" radio PSAs, these videos don't feature any of that jazzy pop music you youngsters like to dance to. Still, I think the female viewers will appreciate these videos not just for their meaty wisdom, but will enjoy emulating the spokes model's stylish fashion sense. However, if you feel a little like you're not doing enough to make your family's dinner pleasant and enjoyable by looking your best, don't get too disappointed girls. Not everyone can look as good as Barbara or Laura Bush! And with these gorgeous hunks of beef you'll be serving, who'll notice?

Oh, and remember, lamb chops make a healthy, protein rich and delicious breakfast.